Saturday, 31 July 2010


Wednesday, 28 July 2010

I am proud. Why? This book means a lot to me and no it's not written by me

but it made me realise things that were already inside me. I've already said it changed my life, I stand by that.

This is a WONDERFUL review.

I dedicate this post, because I want to, to someone in my life and they will know who they are.

Tuesday, 27 July 2010


Monday, 26 July 2010

I'm going to post this on fetlife as well.

What category this would fit into there and anywhere else, I don't know.

Everyone has their beliefs. I think people change but I don't think you can make someone change or a group change. Not that I want to manipulate anyone but I've often had people say I am broadminded. I'm not special, I can articulate but I don't think of myself as a big deal, because humanity, broadmindednes, the ability to articulate I believe comes with experience and requires no special skill or talent, I think every human should have at least humanity and be broadminded. My point in posting on here is that I have seriously been thinking why I want to participate in the bdsm lifestyle. And to me it will be a lifestyle. I want to evolve. I was going to use the word pushed but I don't want to be pushed in terms of pain for the sake of it. I will go through pain, I will enjoy it because of the person giving me it.

Under no circumstances, do I want to be bullied. There are times where I have felt, hurt me. Hurt me like I hurt inside. The person who gives me the pain, who gives me what they want to give me, should respect me too. And someone who respects me wouldn't hurt me without a reason. That doesn't imply that hurting me with a reason means they respect me. I don't believe in that.

I don't understand human nature. I don't understand giving strangers a hard time. I don't understand putting someone down. Sure, I'm told it's because of such and such reason but I have no patience or empathy for that. In time, I have become stronger, I think faster, I work harder. Cliche but so, so true for me and I would say a fair few people.

What I am looking for is someone or some people who believe in what I have said above. Those who believe different, unless you harm other people, I don't have a problem with you and I would love to mix with you but I won't do anything sexual with you. Well, I think I won't. I'm horny. I'm incredibly aroused most of the time. I tingle, I crave and I need but I value what I have written which has come about after thinking furiously for the past few days.

I would rather be alone for the rest of my life than not be with someone who I can get into a relationship with which is selfless, and I do believe some are, and real connection. Love? I know that word, I know that feeling but I believe MORE in a real connection. To look for kink? It's not the be all and end all. I think there's an element of kink in "vanilla" relationships and so I would gladly go as vanilla as needed or as kinky as needed. It all depends on the relationship because I don't define relationships by kinky or not and they don't make the whole of that relationship.

I don't just want to explore my sexuality, I want to live. The bad, by that I mean the mistakes, I will take, I'll go through it, I want to learn, I have my beliefs as I've written above but I'm human like everyone else and nothing special, no more intelligent, I believe special comes from the bdsm, I actually do believe that and not because someone is better than someone else. I will leave those labels for society. I'm not looking for acceptance no matter that it hurts I don't get it from others because it should and will, I know from experience, only come from me.

Okay, essay over and just one more thing, don't judge me from my appearance. Whether that's your natural instinct, just remember that face you see is in a snapshot. If you see me in person, you still don't see all of me.

Sunday, 25 July 2010

I've read so much today I feel I could vomit a book. But I haven't written for a week. Just too much in my mind.

I need to feel first. So, finally I got to this website and found the posts very interesting. I loved the quotes on the side and decided to copy and paste the ones that I very much agreed with to this blog as food for thought on a late Sunday night.

Go forth, conquer, have a GREAT week.

Millions long for immortality who don't know what to do on a rainy Sunday afternoon. --(Susan Ertz)

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did. So throw off the bowlines, sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. (Mark Twain)

I, with a deeper instinct, choose a man who compels my strength, who makes enormous demands on me, who does not doubt my courage or my toughness, who does not believe me naive or innocent, who has the courage to treat me like a woman. --(Anais Nin)

I do not want to be the leader. I refuse to be the leader. I want to live darkly and richly in my femaleness. I want a man lying over me, always over me. His will, his pleasure, his desire, his life, his work, his sexuality the touchstone, the command, my pivot. I don’t mind working, holding my ground intellectually, artistically; but as a woman, oh, God, as a woman I want to be dominated. I don’t mind being told to stand on my own feet, not to cling, be all that I am capable of doing, but I am going to be pursued, fucked, possessed by the will of a male at his time, his bidding. --(Anais Nin)

I think I will lead my man though- me. !

Friday, 23 July 2010

As official as I'll ever get review for Comfort Food. The non Jeremy book but the book that changed my life.

It's written by Kitty Thomas and I left this review on Smashwords. I have issues with Amazon. Not moral ones but those of the technical variety which bums me because I like the author.

I'd give it ten stars. This book changed my life. I'm an avid reader of Erotica but this oe made me realise how important this type of relationship is to me. I had read bdsm books and perhaps some of you don't class this as bdsm because it goes further or it's more taboo. Nothing got to me as much as this book. The first time I read it, I was immensely interested. I had dreams about this book. It will be the book I always go back to and one that has firm fixture in my life. There are books that make me cry and wow me. This one holds something more because it goes that step further. I didn't realise until I read the book that I was interested in capture and kidnap. In fact up till then, when I read it in other books, good books, it didn't really do anything for me, I found that part a bore - you know why? This as the author has said is about dominance and not the illusion of it. It's not role play. It is ACTUALY submission. It's beautiful. It's free-ing. I ADORE this book and I can't wait to have the hard cover copy when it comes out and I don't normally fork out for those.

You know Jeremy from Comfort Object, you're kind of bitchy.

But you turn me on so much.

Here comes a crush.

It's funny because I love the captor from Comfort Food, I love Buck from Sweet Caroline but Jeremy does funny things to me with that goddamned mouth of his. He's absolutely perverted, which fucks with me anyway but like I say, he's also kind of a bitch.

So get out of my mind, Gray.

Have a good weekend folks xx

Thursday, 22 July 2010

Comfort Object by Annabelle Joseph.

I picked up this book after a recommendation. I then saw it was featured on blogs including one of my new favorite authors, Kitty Thomas.

Of course with Comfort Food deep in my system (trust me both these books have comfort but they are to me meant in different ways)I knew I wouldn't be able to commit to Comfort Object that easily.

But let's face it I'm horny as fuck.

I didn't have a problem with Jeremy even before I read his pov. People were saying he was cold, an asshole. Actually no he just went after what he wanted and yeah so it wasn't a nice guy approach or moral but I haven't particularly cared for moral or nice in that respect. I like nice in a guy, but I also like bad in their approach. Jeremy is a bad, naughty, wicked man. The language in the last chapter. Oh MY Jeremy!

And the heroine a pushover? Are you fucking kidding me?! In fact I was feeling like a fish out of water compared to her strength. She was SO NOT a pushover. It was clear she wanted to have the fuck of her life by the man who could give her that and that's why she agreed. Okay well that's what I think anyway.

The thing is, I crave the silence Comfort Food has. Funnily enough, before we got to the story, the author of CF wrote, "To Silence, not always the enemy."

I was always one for dirty talk. Hot, hot, sticky, messy talk. But now I want the hard actions only. Comfort Food has made me crave it so bad.

And Comfort Food had less about the physical description of the heroine. Once you read a book which is more about action, less about the talk and the superficial details, I don't mean that in a bad way but I don't know what other description would fit as a one word description, then for me it means you applaud when it's done in books. Everyone has their way of writing however.

Comfort Object is a long ebook, something I like. I like to know more, I like more to read so I will enjoy reading the rest and post back if something paricularly affects me. For now I will just say it's really good but I'm still in love with something else.

Although I don't know if I have a crush on Jeremy or he's too loud and insulting with his language- when he's actually insulting her. He's a hard man for sure, but I like them like that. And Nel is AMAZING. Though I'm guilty of it too, I'd like more of a backstory, I know people can take a liking to each other but very often it just comes off as a looks mixed with a certain thing kind of affair. This applies to every story, mine too.

I am now coming around to say red hair being this strong thing to a male. You know, before I used to think what if it wasn't for the hair but I'm getting more on board with preferences. I don't hate men for it anymore.

Five reasons I want to submit to a dominant.

So I have been thinking, thinking, thinking even more than I usually do. I questioned myself a lot, brought a lot of stuff up.

I asked myself, am I only swept away by a good book?

Do I just want something exciting, a possibility of that?

Can I imagine myself doing what a sub does? The rules vary, I know.

Do I want to be submissive in this relationship?

Just because something affects you to the extent you're having dreams about it and crying, doesn't mean it's for you.

Am I only into kink?

Well, to answer those, and to quite frankly say out loud I want to submit to a dominant because that's what I WANT and NEED, here are my reasons,

I was jealous when I read the book. First I was suprised that actually I wanted what Emily has. Then I realised well she lucked out and that the book in a way is kind of an extension of the deepest, truest themes in romance. To me, that's how I feel anyway. Sure, it's not conventional. The fact it isn't conventional, I questioned myself on that, is that why I'm into it too? No, I want to be pushed. I want the fear. I want a man who pushes me, who excites me, and perhaps makes me fear him on some level, I want a man like this in my life. Do I just want a man in my life? Whilst I can't deny that a man would be good, I do know that a simple relationship when it comes to me is going to turn kinky. As quoted from the author, I want domination, not the illusion.

Whilst it's certainly something different, it overwhelms me. The fact that it's differnt and the fact it's actually becoming so clear that is what I must do. I felt excited when I took photos of myself but with this, it goes further, not because it involves another person, or perhaps more we shall see, but because it's something that's in me and I'm very clear about it now. Knowing what I want is not exciting, it's something else. It fills me with other emotions that I can't quite explain straightaway.

I won't be involved with someone who is into minors, grandmas for the sake of it. I will say that I think I like humiliation. I will say that I'm on the fence about pain. I want to be spanked silly but I don't know if the pain will turn me on even though the idea and concept and thoughts behind it, are so arousing to me. Today my shoes were not comfortable and I liked that they made me taller , yes it's wrong (but I stand out more) and a part of me liked that they weren't comfortable. I'm not sure if I will submit to just any man or a man whom I have a bond with. If you ask me, I think I do want attention. I think that book affected me also because the hero paid her so much attention, but I am shy and I am introverted. Though I do know that sometimes I will smile the widest and laugh the loudest and that's because I love myself in that moment, I'm on a buzz in that moment. I'm not comfortable but that buzz is there. Yes push me, use me, humiliate me, disgust me, I want to try my best. This isn't a subject to pass, this is me I don't know really being pushed, but also having that interaction which despite my shyness, I need.

Punishing a man physically, by teasing, though... I can't forget that entirely. Do I "only" want to submit? For the most part.

I cried because I realised this is what I want and how much I want it. I don't know if my reasons are right but I do know I must go after this. I'm scared and it's no adrenaline buzz for me in the idea itself but I need to do this.

Am I only into kink? No. But I must have it in my life to some extent. The problem is I don't just want the illusion and is role play enough for me? Will I put this before love? I really do not know.

A while ago I wrote a story called Nice Guy. I've yet to write after the point where we get the impression she wants him to rape her. When I started writing erotica, I was deprived but I also wrote about not coming, being pushed and there's a lot of spanking- but when it comes down to it, a spank can be different to punishment and I think I really want the punishment.

To be under someone's thumb. I think actually yeah. To be repressed? Am I saying that soon I will have no problem with arranged marriages? No. And I think being repressed is something else,I think that's when you do what others want and not because inside, you're getting off on it but there will be a line which can blur, are you getting off on it because he wants it? Or someone else wants it?

Books are different. Reality is not glamourous. But I don't want glamour. I've thought about being dragged around someone's basement flat on a leash and I'm even wanting to see how I would feel like that. Like, I need to know. I need to experience. I didn't think I would want to but I do. So glamour is not important and people talk about looks, not valid either to me. I do like reading about dominant men who are control of their bodies however and I like to be in controlof my own, I'm just now wondering if that's what I like and not men being in control too? I can't deny seeing strong muscles doesn't turn me on but I know that won't make me be a sub.

Love isn't this force. It's a bunch of feelings and a whole load of protection. It may feel like a force but there's no thunder bolt though it can be dramatic at times. Love..let me see in the future if that's more important that submitting in itself to a dominant. Not that that can't turn into true love in some way, but I know that I am someone who is independant in my spirit too. Meaning, I don't need love for the sake of it, though not denying it's not nice. I'd just rather have powerful over nice for now at least.

I'd like to go into the bdsm lifestyle. I can imagine being ignored there also but I have to do it, not to try but because I want to go into this lifestyle. Lifestyle. Yes, that's what I want. Meaning I don't just want the illusion of dominance. I want to be dominated.

Sorry that was more than five I know and also another thing -I have a mouth and temper on me.

Wednesday, 21 July 2010

Never before have I felt so envious of a book and heroine as I do now.

This book surpasses everything. You know what, it's THE mind fuck.

I WILL find a way to break through to someone the way the lucky woman in this book has.(Yeah I've changed to "woman" from "bitch" because that's a horrible term to even use as a "joke" plus she's not a bitch. I was just feeling jealous).

"Emily Vargas has been taken captive. As part of his conditioning methods, her captor refuses to speak to her, knowing how much she craves human contact. Told in the first person from Emily's perspective, Comfort Food explores what happens when all expectations of pleasure and pain are turned upside down, as whips become comfort and chicken soup becomes punishment."

If you have 3 dollars, buy this ebook. I never knew I would be interested in this but I am INSANELY obsessed with this book. To inspire my writing is a big thing but to inspire my own wants and needs, I have to know so much more about myself and I will have to take risks and they could hurt me but I have to. I just need to be very very cautious. I don't know if I'm like Emily but I do know I want the intensity like she has here. I don't know about that type but I want and, actually, desperately need that level.

I'm not mincing my words here.

And I will be buying the hard print version of this book when it's next out and this author's next book and The Story of O.

"Captivating. Haunting. Kitty Thomas writes a page turning story that can't be put down until the last word is read. Comfort Food exquisitely portrays the sensory overload we perceive to be a sensory deprivation and the sensory deprivation that is truly our need to exist in society. Five stars and two thumbs up, I would definitely recommend to any and all who enjoy a good book."

"Comfort Food is like nothing I've ever read before but WOW is it a powerful read! Told in first person narrative by Emily you journey with her from the minute she wakes up tide to a chair and blindfolded. I loved her voice and it was scarily easy to imagine you were in her place. Given the situation she was in I'm not sure that anyone would have been able to handle things differently. The worst thing for Emily is that she can see what he is doing to her but she is powerless to resist.

The book does include scenes of BDSM which I confess isn't something I've read a lot of. It isn't a light hearted affair with what we would consider normal consent and there is no such thing as a safe word but Emily's captor doesn't do anything without her agreement. Emily can choose to say no at any time but then she is left alone in her empty grey cell with food passed silently through the door. Given the choice of nothingness or doing what her captor requests she finds herself accepting anything just to have his company and attention.

Although Comfort Food takes you on a dark and disturbing journey and isn't a book for the faint hearted it is an incredibly powerful story and one that I devoured in an afternoon. We've all heard stories of women who have been captured and held prisoner for years but it tends to be something that society tries not to think about and rarely discusses. It isn't something that should be pushed under the carpet though & I can't recommend reading this book strongly enough. I'm still thinking about the story days after I finished reading it and I know it will effect me for a long time to come. In my opinion that is the sign of a good story and if you're brave enough to give it a try I'm sure you won't regret it."

It's not like the movie Secretary is the bible to me but it's the nearest thing which has romance and a heroine I actually like in a movie.

For instance, Bridget Jones annoys me. I like what she's about but her speaking without thinking, ladette behaviour and class prejudice makes her a heroine I can't count on.

I do like Elizabeth Bennett in Pride and Prejudice though and even if I'm still on the fence about Mr Darcy, I can see he loves her so much and that's a winner in my book.

And then there's your "kick ass" American ladies. That's fine. But I can't relate to a woman with witty one liners, I admire her but she's different to me.

But Lee from Secretary, the fact that she's not presented as one way or the other, I personally feel that despite the fact we're given this cliche of a character though cliches do sometimes have truth in them. No cliche in self harm but people linking that between that and sadomasochism, although I personally don't feel it plays that way in the movie, the way she walks, her voice (not only soft spoken but verging on little girl lisping parody is what I initally thought), these are things I don't like. BUT when Lee changes, she really changes, she really evolves. I think that's why I LOVE Secretary and that's why it wins out over things I don't like.

I love James Spader but it's taken me time to get round to his character in this movie, not the dominating part, that I don't have a problem with at all or his thing about worms and pens, I don't need an explanation for everything, and I don't need labels like "quirks," it is what it is, it's his buisness, it doesn't affect my opinion of somebody's personality, I don't believe in analysing things that much. His interaction with his ex bothered me amongst a few other things.

I think the movie is a bit too traditional in one sense but that's just the tone for this movie. So okay I can accept that even if it's not something that I enjoy that much.

People have a problem with the last quarter of the movie. They say the movie starts well but for me the movie starts off okay but the last quarter make it something that defines me. And the ending. When she's looking in the camera..OH MY GOD. Perfect. THAT'S why I love Lee.

But I have always had a curiosity for a movie which was nearer to the short story that this was based on, because THAT ending I would have loved to have seen. In a different movie.

The intensity of love in this movie makes it my kind of romance. And the sadomaschochism? Aside from the spanking, it's really only their relationship that I have interest in. The fact Mr Grey, Spader's character will go there but not quite all the way and it's Lee who provides that strength when it was Mr Grey who helped her with her esteem, and the differences in their characters, they to me are different in ways even if they complete one sentence together, but mostly it's the fact he likes and loves her. I see that romance, and I care about that more so than any other romance in movies so far. (Well aside from Neil Perry and Todd Anderson from Dead Poets Society who I feel weren't gay but could be persuaded by one buxom heroine -me-to take part in a little menage a trois. But that's another time). (And Ethan Hawke's Jake Hoyt from Training Day who has sex repetedly with a sexy little stripper- me- and good boy that he is, leaves his wife).

Tuesday, 20 July 2010

Candy's Daddy by Cherry Lee.

So this book is fast becoming my visceral favourite. And something that pushes and tests me. I didn't realise how much the Daddy thing turned me on. But when I think about it, it's an extension of love and protection and role play. And I LOVE role play. Not because I want to be someone else but because I like to mix it up. So, if I say that it would seem fun to look for someone specifically into being my Daddy, then I would say it's fun and that it would an education for better or worse. I honestly don't know how far I could take it, reading is different to being in that relationship or situation yourself.

So many things about Candy's Daddy turn me on but you know before that, I was heavily into At Her Captain's Command. That was something where the woman was constantly spanked, so HOT, and since I love my own biggish boobs and she had big boobs and you know she was a fish out of water in this book and that made her submissive and I'm not implying that having big boobs makes you submissive, but it's a very feminine image that she brought to mind, big breasts, bed room eyes. Well the submission turned me on incredibly. When the Captain customised her panties so they they were crotchless and he saw her take them off and her pussy juices drip down her legs, I swear the writing was RED HOT, I'm doing a bad job here, he just turned more animal, as it is he was something more than just a man, he had an anger, an edge. But he was also protective of his woman. This is a similar point to Candy's Daddy.

These are both books that really get me into the moment and until now I never thought it would affect my brain too. I mean yeah I fantasised about a Captain figure but I always thought I wanted my freedom too. Now I find myself wanting to look for a Daddy. Or someone to just plain submit to.

I want that. I didn't know so much before that I did, but now I know I want to look for that, that's on my list.

I was talking with someone a while ago about books that take submitting a step further and when I read them to begin with, they don't grab me like they do some other people, but for sure some once I read them, they're in me.

The thing is, I'm growing my hair because I have healthy hair and it's like just wanting to have length that so far I don't give it, because since I was young, I've been cutting it cut into a bob, but in these books the women have long hair. Part of me wants to be like them but I'm not them because I'm a differnt person and they are, no one is the same. And it does sadden me when the women have certain images in these books. It took me some time to see a shaved pussy is sexy. I mean I like it on me. But the idea, what it represents, it's kind of dangerous, taboo, and you know I don't want taboo for the sake of it, I just want really great sex and to feel really sexy and unfortunately a shaved pussy makes me feel that way actually. Women come in shapes and sizes but even in Erotica, they are are stereotyped. A woman could be slender, have short hair and small breasts and still be as sexual as a voluptuous, long haired woman. I know certain images are more appealing to certain people but your point of view can change, I just wish it was given a chance. I'd like to see more variation in the Erotica heroines no doubt about that. In Candys Daddy, the young woman has small breasts and she's petite, looks younger than her age, it's like I look my age, and I have big breasts, do I not get to have a Daddy?

After I read Candy's Daddy, I was curious about the author's other work so I bought Branded. It has an incest storyline in it. You'll see an excerpt and you can decide for yourself. It's not as erotic to me as Candy's Daddy but I can tell it's a slow burner, it will get to me like CD.

An excerpt from CD, followed by a Branded excerpt,

Mine. My girl. The primitive voice clamored inside Bob and for a moment, he
forgot why in the hell he was doing this. It no longer seemed like a good idea to share at

He sat apart from the others, watching and listening as Candy slipped easily into
her waitress persona and made small talk with the guys. Small talk drifted into the realm
of flirting and in a short while, without any direction from him, the flirting crossed the
threshold of a scene. Candy became the teen schoolgirl who’d gone to a college party
and stayed long after the other girls had gone home. The drinking grew heavier and the
innuendo in their chatting, more broad.

Frank was the first to cross the line and touch Candy, slipping an arm around her
and fondling her tit through her blouse. “Why don’t you take your blazer off, sweetheart?
School’s over.” He helped her out of her jacket.

“You don’t have a bra on, do you?” Dennis commented, his eyes trained on the
dark circles of her aureoles, clearly visible through the white cotton blouse.

Candy put a hand to her mouth in a parody of surprise. “Oops! Must have
forgotten today.”

Miguel pressed against her other side on the couch. He slid his hand up her
front, casually loosening buttons on the way. He slipped his hand inside and copped a
feel. “Nice little titties you got, girl.”

Candy giggled and pushed her chest out. “Little is right.”

“That’s cool with me. More than a handful is too much,” he said.

Dennis knelt in front of her and offered her another drink. Bob had permitted
alcohol for this one night, both to help her relax and to add to the illusion of the frat party

“You eighteen yet?” Dennis asked. “You don’t look like it.”

“Hell, she’s only fourteen,” Frank said. “She’s in my little sister’s class in high

“Teenage pussy spells trouble. Maybe we shouldn’t,” Dennis cautioned.

“Shut up. She’s willing and I’m fucking horny.” Frank pulled Candy’s blouse open,
baring her left breast. Miguel did the same on the right. And then both men descended
on her small tits, sucking the erect brown nipples into their mouths.

Dennis stopped arguing and moved closer to her knees, running his hands up
under the short, pleated skirt. And in the midst of all the attention, Candy closed her
eyes and moaned softly, her body lifting into their hands and mouths.

Bob was electrified, frozen in his seat, his eyes riveted on the scene playing out
before him. He could join too, become one of the sex-driven frat boys, but for now he
was content to watch, while they fondled and suckled his girl.

She was beautiful like that, with her eyes closed and her lips parted--a picture of
voluptuous young womanhood. Dennis had burrowed his head underneath her skirt and
from Candy’s gasps it was clear what he was doing to her.

“You like this, baby, huh?” Miguel’s voice was a soothing purr as he pinched her
nipple between his fingers and nuzzled into her neck. He covered her mouth with his
and stole a kiss without stopping his restless plucking of her nipple.

Frank pulled off her other breast with a wet pop. “Fuck this. My cock’s about to
burst.” He rose, unfastened his jeans and flipped out his cock, hard and ready for

Candy’s eyes opened wide as she stared at the cock only inches from her face.

“What do you think I’m gonna do with that?”

“Suck it.”

“No way. What kind of a girl do you think I am?” She managed to sound indignant
even while Miguel was twisting her tit and Dennis was foraging under her skirt.

“The kind who likes to get felt up but doesn’t want to put out,” Frank said. “Here
I’ll make it easy for you.” He picked up a glass of whiskey and dipped his cock in the
amber liquid before holding it out to her again. “You like to drink. Suck off the whiskey.”

Her doe-eyes widened and suddenly she looked every bit the fourteen-year-old
who’d gotten in way over her head. “I don’t know…”

He shoved his cock toward her mouth. “Suck, bitch.”

Her cherry-red lips rounded to a circle and she drew his cock into her mouth.
Miguel pulled away from kissing her neck to watch his friend’s cock slowly engulfed in
that sweetly pursed mouth. “Hot.”

He stood and unfastened his own fly, letting his jeans drop down his lean hips.

He picked up Candy’s hand and wrapped it around his brown cock, guiding her hand up
and down its length. Candy’s gaze darted from one man to the other. She murmured a
muffled protest, but Frank held her head firmly between his hands as he fed her his

Meanwhile, Dennis had emerged from beneath her skirt. He dragged her panties
and skirt down her legs so her glistening bare pussy was revealed. He stood and took
out his cock, rubbing it fast with his fist while he watched Candy sucking Frank and
pumping Miguel.

“She’s got a free hand, bro,” Miguel said. “Use it.”

Candy was as limp as a doll, helplessly giving in when Dennis took her other
hand and wrapped it around his cock. Bob stood and moved to a better vantage point
where none of the men’s bodies was blocking his view.

Candy sat on the very edge of the couch with Frank in front of her, nearly
gagging her as he fucked her mouth, and the others on either side, forcing her to pump
their cocks. She whimpered--a soft, sad little sound that wrenched Bob’s heart and
simultaneously made him so hard he thought he’d come right then. The image of the
used girl was so erotic and so sensual it set his body on fire.

Bob dropped his trousers and joined his friends at last. “Get her on the floor,” he

Frank pulled out of Candy’s mouth and pulled her to her knees in the center of
the floor. Bob moved in behind her so she was surrounded on all sides by men.

“Please, don’t,” Candy whispered in a high, tiny, voice. But she didn’t use her
safe phrase so Bob knew it was part of the act.


When the walls come tumbling down, can Sondra accept the secret that lies behind them? Strong-willed Sondra is concerned by her sister, Melanie's, new life as a full time submissive in a master dominant's household. To alleviate her sister's worries about this lifestyle, Mel invites her for a visit. Sondra soon begins a sexual journey under the tutelage of Master Damien, exploring levels of desire she never knew she possessed. Will she surrender her will to him and can she acknowledge a facet of herself she thought she'd put behind her?

Warnings: This title contains graphic language and sibling (f/f) incest.

(Yes, it's a conscious decision for me to feature this on my blog).



This is the test, isn't it? To see how still I can hold as the burning brand moves closer and closer to my quivering flesh. My stomach is curdled like old milk and my mouth as dry as paper. I embrace the roiling stomach acid and my thick, swollen tongue, because these small discomforts distract me from the larger one to come. I smell the steaming coals and the heated iron, and imagine I smell charred flesh, but it hasn't happened yet.

No chains and shackles hold me. No stocks confine me. No hands hold me steady. I could bolt at any time, and return to the life I knew a mere two months ago. But I stand and hold my ground. I've chosen what is about to happen.

Clenching my jaw so tight my teeth creak, I brace my hands against the gate and grip the rough wood. The dark voice comes from behind me, so husky and sensual my pussy tenses and releases wetly. "Do you truly want to bear my permanent mark?"

As the brand nearly touches my hip, the heat already singing my flesh, I groan, "Yes. Yes, I want this."

* * * *
Chapter One

"This isn't like you, Mel. You're freaking me out."

"Trust me, sweetie. You have nothing to worry about." My sister's voice was cool and smooth as silk, unruffled despite the fact we'd been arguing for the past twenty minutes. Or actually, I'd been arguing, she'd been responding in that calm, affectionate voice, refusing to rise no matter how I baited her.

"Well, I am worried. You're involved in this strange lifestyle, you barely call anymore, and when we do talk you don't sound like yourself."

"Sondra, believe me, I'm more myself now than I've ever been my entire life. I know it seems weird to you, but have you ever known me to rush into anything? I'm embracing something that makes me happy, and I wish you could be happy for me."

She was right. I was the impetuous younger sister, the one who threw herself into situations without considering consequences. If levelheaded Melanie told me she wanted to be living as essentially a sex slave in some mysterious man's home, I had to believe she was quite serious and hadn't been coerced into it.

"But it's so ... wrong! You've given up your job, your apartment, and you've surrendered your body to this man to ... to do whatever he wants with. How can giving up your will be mentally healthy?"

"I haven't given up my will." Her voice remained infuriatingly calm. I wanted to reach through the phone line and slap her. "You wouldn't believe the willpower it takes to do this, to be this. And I haven't called because I knew you wouldn't understand the life I've chosen. It's just too difficult for an outsider."

Outsider. I was an outsider now? To the sister who'd been closer to me than anyone in my entire life, any friend or lover I'd ever had? Her words hurt. I drew a deep breath and let it out slowly. This might be my one chance to reach out to her and keep our communication open. I knew I must choose my words carefully for once.

"You're right. I don't know anything about BDSM or about what draws some people to be dominants or submissives. But, if it's as fulfilling as you say, maybe it's something I should check out. How would your ... master ... feel about having a houseguest for a two-week visit? I've got some time coming at work and my plan was Cancun, but I'd much rather see you."

There was a long pause. For a moment, I thought she'd turn me down, then Melanie spoke breathlessly. "Seriously? You'd come to Napa? Oh honey, I'll have to ask Master Damien, but if he permits it, I'd love to see you."

"Ask him then and call me as soon as you know." I managed to keep the disdain from my voice. But inside her words rankled. Asking for permission from a man? Such bullshit!

Mel's voice bubbled with excitement. "You'll love the estate and the vineyards. It's so gorgeous here, and as for the rest of it, honestly, at first you might be a little freaked out, but I think you'll start to understand our relationship."

I was already freaked out. Seeing dungeons, torture equipment and sex toys first hand could hardly make it any worse.

"I'll send you a couple of very good books to give you an overview of the different elements of the lifestyle."

Kinky sex homework. Nice. This should be a vacation to remember.

Monday, 19 July 2010

Hate between the sexes. Do men hate women? Do women hate men? Do I hate men? Do they hate me?

It started off as an innocent enough search. I was watching some sex documentaries, oh come on they're fun AND you get to learn something (well actually you don't), and then I got to searching for Bettie Page. Then I somehow got onto "So right it's wrong.Conservative women I'd like to hate fuck." Anyone seen this list? Apparently Playboy published it and then took it away from their website. The idea of this list shocks me. Hate fuck. That phrase..

I mean I've heard anger sex but the way women are referred to in this list, words and sentences like her eyes are batshit crazy or you'd be better off sucking so and so and she's pregnant she stays pregnant, Karma's a bitch.

I'm not likening this list to Maxim's one where they list women they find ugly. I also don't think that putting a spotlight on women with big breasts is the same as this hate fuck list. But I do wonder, do men hate women? Do women hate men? Like, in general? I see the bigger picture. A douche is a douche no matter their sex but I don't trust men. I think they are superficial. There I said it. More superficial than women. I think their "superificial-ness" is something they use more than women, it's more relevant in their day to day life. I will hold up my hands and say there are exceptions but that's my general view of men. I don't hate men though.

The thing is when a man hates a woman, he can rape her. When a women hates a man, she can date rape him, or she can be violent but a man can straight away stick his dick into a woman without consent and ...

I have a reason for my mistrust in men. I have a history with men. I think some women do. A different history to mine and mine is no where near extreme or violent. And just to clarify I haven't been raped. If I didn't have that history, I would still think men are superficial on the whole as a gender but I would be more open to accept that's not the case.

Some women like my mum have been good friends with men and also been seen as sexually attractive to men. When I asked my mum once, why are men aggressive, like when standing up for someone, they can willingly call a woman a cunt, or they bellow when they shout, or get angry quickly, not that women don't but I've seen this more in men, she said it's testosterone. But that also works in good ways. I told her I didn't like this testosterone thing much.

Now I can only speak as a woman. Obviously. If you're a man you will probably hate me for writing this. If you're a woman you might too. But in writing this, I feel I should be honest about me too, my feelings.

So if a man and woman walks into the room, I will more likely make eye contact with the woman. I will trust the woman more. Unless the man smiles at me, if a human regardless of their gender smiles at me, I will make eye contact with them because I like politeness and humanity. But if none of them smile initially, it will be the woman whom I make friends with. This is based on my experience with men and my opinions.

Honestly, do I hate men? A little yes. Why? Because of some of my experiences. I don't feel all men are the same but I can't trust a man face to face. If I'm not shy around them, I will be uncomfortable around them whereas with women, I don't have this at all.

I know men don't hate me. I think some women and men say they do but I know they think of me, if that, as something that bugs. I could imagine being attacked by a man though. I think in a moment, he could become angry with me even if I said nothing at all.

But to hate fuck? NO.

There is a side to me that has a use me, fuck me and then leave me alone thing. This applies to random strange men. Not ones I have befriended to any extent. It would serve, in my mind, as a catharsis.

And yes the odd time I have "imagined" rape. Again, a catharsis. Wound me physically to this extent so the damage some humans have done to me emotionally is ..I don't know, balanced? Or shows. Because emotional damage on a woman that doesn't have a fragile's like even if my body is thin, I'm seen as sturdy. Hurt me because I can take it- I feel that's how others see me. No one has ever said don't pick on her.

It's either that, or they don't care. They know I'm hurting but that doesn't matter.

But despite it all, I can have a normal relationship. I can be so giving and in love. I'm generous in sex. I don't want to please men. I have my own needs to please. Photos you see of me are because of ME. I'm an exhibitionist. My point about relationships, is I like the man I am in a relationship with. I love certain men, I really like certain men. It's the human in them. I can recognise it but I won't trust the MAN fully. I feel I can't.

I read a quote about Bettie Page. "Her pose and smile said come play with me. Not use me or degrade me."

I believe in that quote entirely. I don't think men hated her. I think they loved her. Not just felt lust for her but I think they trusted her as a woman. She was a man's woman. Not just a sex symbol. Am I wrong? I actually ask that question by the way!

The bondage I felt was not out of a man wanting to hate fuck her. Or what I think is seperate to a hate fuck unless it's taken further, rape her. It was simply for the reason I want to get spanked. It's enjoyable.

So, I don't have any answers. I can go round in circles. I'll come to a close here. It's not easy bringing this up. I don't enjoy the fact it will anger people but like I say I do have to wonder. I have to wonder about how objectifying women that affects hate between the sexes. I have to wonder about status, values, religion, class, culture, experience, personality, personal rape...all these things in our life affecting hate between the sexes. Do you hate men? Do you hate women? Do you think men and women hate each other?

And one more thing, do men get angered by women who aren't submissive in their natures? If they are submissive in the bedroom, when you see a woman taking charge, what do you really feel?

I managed to find the book I was looking for.

You know, that whole head sex post. I'm a dirty, dirty woman. I'm finding the visceral more erotic than the intellectual, though please do not let the intellectual die, it's very important and equally as life affirming! Thank you for all your suggestions, I am still interested in the books I said I was, I just needed something like this for the moment.

It's not that I want this kind of relationship, it's more about the fact limits are being pushed and yeah I kind of smirked at the "Popsicle" thing.

Candy's Daddy excerpt

Her admission of submissiveness was just what he wanted to hear. Bob probed a
little further as he whisked the eggs to a froth. “Would you say you’re adventurous?”

“Very.” She set the glass on the counter with a click and slid off the stool. “You?”

“I can be.” He stopped beating the eggs and gazed down into her face, tilted up
toward his. “Role playing can be fun.”

“Yes indeed.” Candy grinned. “Disobedient serving wenches who deserve a
whipping. Secretaries who ruin a big account and get spanked by their bosses. Naughty
schoolgirls earning a punishment from the headmaster.”

“Do all your fantasies center around punishment?” Bob set the bowl on the
counter and reached out to stroke his finger from her throat up to her chin, tipping it
higher. “Loving care can be sexy, too. Daddies taking care of their little girls.”

His cock twitched just from saying the words. He swallowed hard and awaited
her reaction. If she showed distaste, as many women did, he would gloss over the
fantasy and move on to something else. Maybe repressed librarians waiting to be

But Candy’s eyes lighted up at the idea. “You like to play at being a Daddy.”

Honey, I’d love to be your Daddy. Tonight. Tomorrow. Whenever and for as long
as you’d like.

“I think it’s kind of hot,” he admitted.

“Not everyone does,” she said. “I’ve used my little girl voice before and just about
driven men right out of bed.”

He cleared his throat and murmured low. “Let me hear your little girl voice.” He
stroked her throat with his finger again and felt the subtle vibration when she spoke.

“I’m hungry, Daddy. Will you make something for me to eat?” The high, breathy
request nearly made him come.

“Absolutely, baby girl.” He closed the last few inches between them and pressed
his lips to hers in a tender kiss before pulling away. “But first, would you like to do
something for me?”

“What, Daddy?” Christ, the sound of her soft voice calling him that drove him
crazy. He wanted to protect and cuddle her, to possess and ravage her.

“Would you like to play a little game before I make your food?”

She clapped her hands together. “I love games.”

“In this one, Daddy will take some of his clothes off and you’ll play at sucking on
a Popsicle.”

“All right. That sounds fun. Shall we play right here?”

“No. In the living room.” Bob put his arm around her shoulders and guided her
from the kitchen to the other room. He sank down on the plush comfort of the sofa and
pulled Candy onto his lap.

She wrapped her arms around his neck and snuggled against him while he
stroked her hair and told her what a good girl she was. Candy nuzzled into the side of
his neck, rubbing her nose against his jaw. “Scratchy.” She giggled. “Daddy needs to

He let her explore him with her mouth and hands, touching his face, his neck and
rubbing her hand over his chest and shoulders through his shirt until he couldn’t stand it
any more. His throbbing cock pressed hard against his jeans and he was desperate to
feel her warm hand and wet mouth surrounding it.

Bob grasped Candy around the waist and lifted her off his lap. “You should kneel
in front of me for this game. Pretend the ice cream truck drove past. You begged me for
money, but I didn’t have any change in my pockets so I had to say no.”

Candy was a natural at role playing. She fell right into his story, drawing her
brows together in a frown and jutting out her lower lip. “Daddy, why can’t I have ice
cream. I want some!”

“Honey, not today. I don’t have any money on me right now.”

“But I want some,” she wheedled. “I have allowance. I could go buy it with my
own money.”

“Not today,” he said firmly. “The truck is gone now anyway. It’s too late. Besides,
you have to learn you can’t always have your way.”

“You’re mean.”

“Do you want a spanking, Candy? Mind your tone.”

“No.” She sounded exactly like a disappointed child. “This isn’t a very fun game.”

Bob sighed. “Look. Maybe I have something that will make up for you not getting
an ice cream cone. I have something that’s sort of like a Popsicle only not cold. Would
you like to see it? And then if you want, maybe I’ll let you suck it.”

Immediately her face brightened. Again she clapped her hands together. “Where
is it? Show me.”

Bob reached for his zipper and slowly drew it down. Beneath, he wore a pair of
plain white briefs. The hard ridge of his cock was clearly outlined by the cotton fabric.

“Why don’t you pull down my pants and see what’s underneath.” His voice was a gruff
rasp he was so fucking turned on.

"Da-dum, da-da-da-da-da-da-da Da-dum, da-dum Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da"

Every now and then when a movie shakes up my world, I take my time to review it.I hope to get this published on IMDB. The only other movie in my life that I have done this for is Dead Poets Society.

I fell in love with this movie and the master behind it, David Lynch., 19 July 2010

I'm used to seeing different movies. I have prior to this never seen a David Lynch movie though I've heard quite a bit about Blue Velvet and Mullholland Drive for sure. I rented Mullholland Drive because of Naomi Watts, an actress I admire greatly. The first time I watched the movie, it played as a straight up tale of an aspiring actress mostly, if jumbled and what I thought was blah oddball blah /messy at times. Like I say I have never watched a Lynch movie before.

Since I had the movie on rental I decided to make the most of it and give it another go. I have now become obsessed with it. You see I went along with the movie, I went with the flow.

At the moment I am in love with Betty's storyline but the movie has a lot more going on. It will take me time and a re watch, oh what a hard life, of Adam's (played by Justin Theroux) interactions with the producers and with The Cowboy. I also still don't have a clue about the two dudes laughing one minute in an office, and quite a different story the next. And much has been made of the kiss scene. To me, it's not that big a deal, I would say more sad than titillating, and even though I enjoy titillating, it's not the thing that sticks in my mind about Mullholland Drive. Sad that people talk about that over a brutal shooting in a movie.

I had read some time ago the different interpretations of Mullholland Drive. The movie is haunting not because of the interpretations but because of the Winkies diner scene and the ending. And now, I see something else that gives me creeps in such a way I fell in love with Naomi Watts for being able to convey something through one look, the power of mental strength. Wanting something so bad. I will say no more!

I don't know if I follow the interpretations religiously but I do know that I am grateful for putting in a DVD in that requires all of me to pay attention. A movie has been made that isn't mindless entertainment or lazy in any way. I LOVE David Lynch for truly creating something and for introducing me to a world of a movie that is so different to the ones I know and love. I'm a lay person when it comes to all things "Lynchian." I can't define yet what Lynch does that makes him different to the other greats, directors like Peter Weir, Antoine Fuqua, but if you know their work you can understand what I mean.

After I watched the movie for the second time, I got the strangest dreams. What's real? I read a criticism of Lynch's work, that if his characters had any soul he wouldn't have to create oddball or quirky. I had been watching movies before Mullholland Drive all about the souls and characters, I am now thinking there is more so called quirk and odd ball in this world than deep, meaningful events, our ideas are deep and meaningful but strange, strange things happen and whilst Mullholland Drive is not quite just about strange things happening, it's a movie that you give your own meaning to. If you need to do that.

This movie inspires me. I want to see all of David Lynch's work and I can't get the song, I Have Told Every Star out of my head. "A poisonous ode to Hollywood." I like that but it's not the be all and end all statement for this beautiful, intelligent and mysterious movie. A class above.

Saturday, 17 July 2010

I need brain sex.

I'm not looking for a quick release, watch some porn and come. I want suggestions on a really erotic read. Anything nearing or exactly kinky, politically incorrect, no romantic ending, pushing limits, please can you recommend me an ebook that could fit any of these. Oh it also has to be something I haven't read before, I need to not know what I'm reading.

Of course tomorrow, I'm going to have to take care of myself, I just would like something that doesn't rely on after 2 days pent up arousal, I want my mind broadened, nothing is too shocking - NO GRANDMA'S OR MINORS PLEASE! or ANIMALS!- I can't write because I want to READ.

Friday, 16 July 2010

Hmm..Mullholland Drive.

I did myself a favour reading wiki after I watched the movie. I know I will be shot down by purists for doing such a thing but I'm glad I got to read different interpretations because when I watched the movie, I loved the style in places, the song sequences are my favourite and I really rate Naiomi Watts but I wasn't at all impressed with Laura Harring beautiful though she would be considered (I know she was supposed to be vacant and I've read the intepretation of projecting your own stuff on her like a blank canvas) and I wasn't impressed with the supposed likeness between Justin Theroux's character and David Lynch, if that's what David Lynch is like, it destroys any like I have to see one of his much talked about movies.

The love making scene actually pissed me off. This is a GUY'S erotic scene. All camera displays of tits, I use that word on purpose, I can just imagine a man saying go down lower let's see her tits, the audience would want to see and know what Watt's tits look like and I just found it unnecessary and dare I say gratutious. You all know I'm no prude but watching that scene and then later on, although later on it actually kind of worked a little with the character of Watts, it was titillating for a brief second, Harring looks like a doll, so not my type and her breasts are too perfect but I can see why someone would consider them real in this day and age and maybe they are..anyway my point is she has nice boobs and I like big boobs. And perhaps there was a woman on the camera team but the only sexuality I got is the kind a guy would get where they want to see one woman's breast brush against the others.

Stay focused.

I didn't enjoy Mullholland Drive but I will give it another go. I tempted right now to dismiss it but I'll just say it may work for me the second time and I hope not to be swayed by the interpretations.

So I'd like to go this Mulloholland Drive sometime in this lifetime too, hence the pic.

Have peaceful weekend, people, take care.

Thursday, 15 July 2010

"I want to trace that vein with my tongue. I have such a fetish for male hands."

Just look where he is putting that hand. *fucking myself with my fingers*

Monday, 12 July 2010

So as part of my shunning society thing

I've decided to ditch my padded bras. I am most definitely the size I am but sometimes when I wore the clothes without the padded bra I could see, oh my boobs aren't the main thing sticking out of my body, in fact I noticed one could even call them small, certainly in the society we are in what with the melon fascination. Mine are just fine, round and more than handfuls but they'd be airbrushed to hell if they appeared in a magazine. I've seen the comments on any type of sag in a woman's breasts. Mine though round, sag. It's obviously natural and I ain't wearing a certain type of bra to correct that. I wasn't wearing the padded bras for that purpose before, my purpose was to have them stick out, but I'm buying into the whole western ideal shit by wearing a padded bra. Not that I'm throwing away all my department store clothing and wearing stuff that would conform to the non conformists. My point, they're good breasts and I ain't bothered about having them noticed because I put my comfort first. I love having them free and not bound by some weird matieral, my current bra is a scrap of lace and I can see my areolas, I'll take that any day over the false pertness of a padded bra. It's too much with the levels in this society, she's tall but so and so is taller and I want her/to be like her. She's busty but so and so is more busty I want her /to be like her. You can stick your evolution theories up your arse and your crap about men mating with so and so to get so and so children, if I can mate with someone over deeper reasons that the size of their dick or height then you can too, you're just a superifical dick otherwise and as part of the society that you may mock.

I will express my sexuality the way I want to not the way the man wants. I've always done that anyway and to be honest I don't find compliments great when they're from someone who only likes it when things are in their face, they have to be able to be broadminded, as well as single minded or perhaps specfic is the term. No- I want a good little girl and she has to be a little plain so she doesn't get all the attention from men- shit. Men who take out their frustration of the so called attractive women that fuck them over on other women are shitter than a gold digging ho type of woman, at least these women are going after their little dream.

Friday, 9 July 2010

No fancy title.

Gentlemen, ladies, I am too tired to write and when I write I want it all to come out, can you write something and submit it on here? It can be ANYTHING. A fantasy, but be creative, not just a suck my dick babe, don't forget your balls afterall, I have tittyfuck fantasies, lactation, lesbian ones running through my head. I'm as horny as hell. I'll be frank I want to come but I don't just want to quick fuck myself, I want to come with an oh.

Today I logged on and the group of followers made me heart bounce. Thank you so much for joining and welcome new comers. I want this to be your space too as trite as it sounds. Nice to see your icons, faces or names. Thank you and a peaceful weekend to you all xxxx

Wednesday, 7 July 2010

The writing in this, is red hot. I want to write like this. I love the terms, the names.

You'd think I wouldn't but underneath it all, this is what I like.

"I desperately slammed her ass a few more times, then let out an enraged bellow and blasted white-hot jism deep into the little cutie‟s rippling bum. My body quivered like

a sexual tuning fork as I rocketed load after load of sizzling jizz into Ashley‟s beautiful behind. I filled her sweat-slick caboose to overflowing, my ruptured cock pouring what seemed like a gallon of come inside her."


Cheeky Girls

by Landon Dixon

A short time ago, my girlfriend‟s sister came to visit us for a week. Given that my girlfriend, Ashley, is an absolute knockout, so, too, was her twin sister, Abigail. I couldn‟t tell the jiggly, giggly pair of 18 year-old brats apart; they both had long, black hair and crystal-clear, blue eyes, high, firm tits and jutting nipples, slim waists and supple legs, and, best and most of all, taut derrières.

As an unrepentant ass-man from way back – from the days of a daisy duke-clad Catherine Bach and a shorty-shorted Chrissy Snow and a hot-panted Lynda Carter, aka Wonder Woman – the sight of those two bouncy bottoms prancing and a-twitching all over the place made for one of the most memorable weeks of my life.

On the last day of her stay, we took Abby snowboarding at a resort two hours outside of town. And after an invigorating morning and afternoon of surfing the slopes, we made tracks for the lodge, for drinks and dinner and a dunk in one of the outdoor hot-tubs. My cock had been a diamond-hard icicle all day long thanks to the heavenly vista of the girls‟ board-squatting, ski-pant-clad posteriors, and it didn‟t melt an inch in the bubbling chop of the soak tub, what with the two of them cavorting around in matching neon-green bikini tops and floss bottoms. Their plush, heart-shaped asses, peachy cheeks splayed into two glistening, golden-brown globes by the
bum-cleaving thongs, were openly displayed for my erotic, eye-popping enjoyment.
And with my blood-alcohol level and waterlogged dong rising to near-record heights, I boldly joked about mistakenly going to bed with the wrong girl that night. At which point Ashley pulled her sister up out of the steaming froth and tugged her thong down, showing me a butterfly tattoo on Abby‟s lower, lower abdomen. Ashley sports a tattoo in the exact same spot, only hers is a heart.

After more kidding and more drinks, we finally piled back into the car and drove home. I was totally beat – keeping pace with one wound-up teen vixen is tough enough, let alone two – so I mumbled a slurred goodnight to the gabbing gals and poured myself what I hoped to be a long, fitful sleep. And I was sawing logs like a beaver operating a feller-forwarder when Ashley woke me up by pinching my nose. „Huh? What‟s up?‟ I grunted, turning my head and cracking my neck and squinting at the girl lying next to me.

„I noticed that you had a bit of a “hard” time today – keeping your eyes off my sister and me,‟ she commented glibly, her eyes twinkling mischievously in the dim light of the bedside lamp. „Think maybe you can give me a hard time – like, right now?‟

I ran a wooden tongue over parched lips, the fog in my brain beginning to burn away thanks to Ashley‟s unexpected heat. „A man‟s gotta do ... something,‟ I mumbled, then rolled on top of the hottie, my ever-ready dick pressing long and hard against her warm, flat tummy.
I slid my hands under her nightie and cupped and squeezed her pert titties, started swiping tongue and swapping spit with the raven-haired cutie. Then I jackknifed up so that she could grab hold of my erection and stroke it with her hot little hand. We frenched and
fondled for a good, long time, before I finally broke away from her mouth, pushed up her nightie, and latched my lips onto her jugs. I sucked a flared, mocha nipple into my mouth and tugged on it, then swallowed her whole blessed tit.

„Yes!‟ she breathed. „That feels so good!‟

I sucked and sucked on her boobs, swirled my tongue all over and around her pointed, rubbery nubs. Then I slipped a hand down into her panties in prelude to pulling them off and steering my raging cock into her juicy snatch. But Ashley shocked the hell out of me by grabbing my wrist and saying, „I want it in the bum.‟

I stared at her, wide-eyed and wonder-struck, for I well-knew that the angel-faced teenager was an anal virgin, despite my repeated efforts in the past to pop her bung cherry. I, therefore, praised my Maker and scrambled off of Ashley, flipped her over, and then fumbled a tube of lube out of the bedstand that I‟d been saving for just such a special occasion. I anxiously slathered lube onto my straining prong as I gazed longingly at my teenie‟s cushiony, brown pillows.

I wanted to sink my teeth into those fleshy bumpers, bury my tongue to the tonsils in between her hot buns. But first and foremost, I wanted to shove my fat cock into the little sweetie‟s unviolated butthole before she changed her dirty mind about the whole thing. I pulled her pink, teddy bear-patterned panties down and off and applied hand to ass – gripping her firm, round butt cheeks and squeezing them, kneading them, playfully slapping them around a bit until they blushed red with embarrassment.

Ashley reached back and spread her cheeks in open invitation, and I fingered some lube onto and into her tiny bunghole. Then I dropped the lube, swallowed hard, and gripped my steel-hard prick, pushed my bloated cockhead

up against the girl‟s back-end sex-slot. I had no idea how I was going to fit all of my swollen pork into her ultra-small chute, but I was bound and determined to find a way.

„Fuck me up the bum with your big cock!‟ Ashley bleated, cranking the sexual heat up another few notches.

And as her sparkly-tipped fingers dug into her lush butt flesh, and her hot body trembled with anticipation and nervousness, I recklessly plowed my monster cock-top into her starfish, penetrating her petulant, pink pucker. I held my breath and eased my throbbing rod into Ashley‟s virgin anus. She moaned and buried her face in a pillow, before unexpectedly thrusting her ass upwards, helping me bury my greased bone almost to the balls in her gripping bung. My pole sank deep into her butt, like a spike into the warm, wet earth.

I gripped the sheet on either side of her and churned my hips, slowly at first, barely moving my ass-embedded cock, then faster and faster and faster, torquing up the sexual rhythm to the point where I was banging the babe‟s bum with an animal ferocity. I pounded dick into her bouncing bottom, looming over the groaning girl and pummelling her ass. Great drops of sweat slid off my face and splashed down onto her back, her tremulous ass shivering in time to my frantic cock-thrusts, my heavy balls spanking her bronze booty.

The heat and tightness and mind-blowing eroticism were too fucking intense to resist for long. „I‟m coming!‟ I hollered all-too-soon.

„Come in my butt!‟ Ashley shrieked back, her head jerking to and fro.

I desperately slammed her ass a few more times, then let out an enraged bellow and blasted white-hot jism deep into the little cutie‟s rippling bum. My body quivered like

a sexual tuning fork as I rocketed load after load of sizzling jizz into Ashley‟s beautiful behind. I filled her sweat-slick caboose to overflowing, my ruptured cock pouring what seemed like a gallon of come inside her.

When it was finally over, I collapsed on top of her, my cock and body drained. Then I tugged my wasted dick out of her vice-like petoot and rolled over onto my back next to her, letting blessed sleep hit me again like a ton of bricks.

„Zack!‟ someone hissed in my ear, seemingly only minutes later.

I groaned.

„It‟s Abby,‟ the girl standing over me, shaking my shoulder, whispered. „I need to see you, like, right away.‟

I groaned again, but allowed myself to be pulled out of my warm bed, out of my bedroom, into the neighbouring guest room. I rubbed grainy sleep out of my eyes and squinted at my girlfriend Ashley‟s spitting, drooling image – right down to the skimpy, sheer nightie and pink, teddy-print panties. „Uh, what‟s up, Abby?‟

She hooked a finger in between her pouty lips and stared down at her bare feet. „Well, um, I heard you and sis having sex – I couldn‟t help it, you know, the walls are so thin and everything – and, anyway, it got me, like, kinda hot ... and I was wondering if maybe you and I–‟

„Hold it right there!‟ I blurted. Even half asleep and horny as a toad convention, I still had enough sense to realise that I had too good a thing going with Ashley – especially with anal sex now added to the mix – to throw it away on a fling with her sister. „I can‟t cheat on Ash. It wouldn‟t be right. We‟ve–‟

„I just knew you‟d say that, Zack!‟ she interrupted, sliding her panties down to reveal a heart tattoo just to the

left of her shaven snatch – revealing that she was, in fact, my girlfriend, Ashley. „I was just checkin‟,‟ she giggled. „Now, how ‟bout givin‟ me some of that butt-lovin‟, mister?‟

I wasn‟t sure just exactly what the hell was going on anymore, but if the bubble-bottomed babe wanted a second dose of ass-plowing, then I was game. I grabbed her in my arms and planted my lips on hers. We kissed long and hard and hungrily, until Ashley darted her mischievous tongue into my mouth and entwined it around my tongue.

And after frenching like a couple of hormonally-hopped-up teens riding the rear seat of their parents‟ minivan, Ashley dropped to her knees and got a grip on my fast-swelling dick, started sliding her hand up and down its pulsing length. „Fuck, yeah!‟ I groaned, watching the black-haired beauty pump my prick, juggle my balls around.

„Gotta get you all nice and slick for my bum,‟ she said, staring up at me with her baby-blues, tickling the tip of my dong with her playful, pink tongue.

She twirled her slimy tongue around my cap, licked at my slit, making my knees buckle and my body shudder. I clutched at the girl‟s shimmering hair and held on for dear life. She thoroughly tongue-lashed my mushroomed hood, then pulled my dick up and began painting my shaft with long, wet tongue-strokes.

„That‟s the way, baby!‟ I urged, my fingers buried in her silky tresses.

She ran her wicked tongue from furry balls to leaking knob, over and over, coating my raging dong with saliva, licking me like my meat was melting from the incredible heat. Then, when she had me really all good and lathered

up, she pulled my stiff-as-a-board wood down to her lips and vacuumed my cocktop into her mouth.

I grunted my approval, started moving my hips, Ashley tugging on my cap with her glossy lips. She gulped down more of my member, and more, ‟til she had a good three-quarters of my pulsating pole locked in her mouth. And then she gobbled up the rest of my cock.

„Jesus!‟ I hissed reverentially. The wanton teen had deep-throated me only a precious couple of times before, and never with her equally-attractive sister roaming around loose somewhere in the apartment.

Ashley‟s nose parted my pubes and pressed into my stomach. She had my entire engorged cock crammed into her mouth and throat, and she held me hermetically-sealed there for a long, tense moment, before slowly disgorging my dripping dong until she had just the bloated tip between her blessed lips. Then she dove her head forward and throated me again.

Ashley repeated the blistering sword-swallowing process more times than I can remember, giving me a deep-throat BJ that drove me wild, set the batter in my balls to boiling. But when she sensed that I was teetering on the slippery edge of coming, she yanked my sopping cock out of her mouth before I could douse her tonsils in sticky, liquid love.

„Now that you‟re all juiced-up,‟ she said, „why don‟t you bum-fuck me?‟

I eagerly nodded my agreement. I let go of Ashley‟s hair and grabbed her arms and pulled her to her feet. Then I positioned the succulent teen so that she was bent over at the foot of the bed, hands gripping the polished brass railing, legs spread slightly apart, her bold, sun-kissed bottom staring me in the eye.

„Time for round two,‟ I gritted, grasping her dainty panties and tearing them apart. I spat into my right hand, rubbed the spit into her butt cleavage, against her pucker, and then I grabbed her left cheek with my left hand and knocked on her back door – heaven‟s door – with the heavy head of my cock.

„Fuck me in the bum, Zack!‟ Ashley squealed, knuckles white on the railing, legs trembling.
I punched my hood into her starfish, drove my rod slowly and surely into her chute. She was as awesomely tight as before, and she whimpered softly as I sank my fuck-spear into her anus. I didn‟t stop ‟til I was balls-to-the-butt cheeks.

„Mmmm!‟ my baby moaned, her entire sun-burnished body trembling now.
I gripped her hips and started pumping mine, sliding my long, hard cock back and forth in her chute. She reached down between her legs and rubbed her pussy, frantically buffed her come-button as I relentlessly fucked her ass.

I dug my fingernails into her heated, brown flesh and plundered her bottom, pulling my prong almost all the way out of her ass and then plunging it all the way back in again, over and over and over. Her saucy butt cheeks shimmied with the impact of my body smacking up against them, my cock sawing in and out of her stretched-out bung.

„Ohmigod, I‟m coming!‟ the ass-blasted sweetie suddenly wailed, rubbing her cun in a frenzy.
That did it for me! I hard-cranked her sphincter a couple more times and then sprayed her ass walls with sperm, spewing deep into her bowels, as she was jolted with mighty, multiple orgasms of her own.
I had enthusiastically reamed Ashley‟s taut, teen ass for what I thought was the second time that magical night. To be honest, though, I‟m not exactly sure who got butt-banged how many times, because both sisters were walking kind of funny the following day. And when Abby had left, Ashley coyly confided that, as twins, the two girls always shared everything, but since Abby was the more daring of the two, it was her job to try out new experiences first.

What I do know about that sensational Ashley-Abby interlude is that I fucked bodacious booty twice during one super-sexed night, and Ashley‟s sweet derrière has been mine ever since.

The lady who is a vamp.

And the lady who married one.

I read an article today,

Now I'm fairly sure I have seen this woman perform. I watch porn and for some reason I remember names well. I had wanted to see The Girlfriend experience by Steven Soderberg. Sasha Grey is a woman on a mission. Now, she still remains a mystery to me and I'm not that big a fan of mysteries and personas for the sake of but I like her guts so to speak and her brains. I'm more a fan of her thinking, than I am "shrewd buisness women" like Jenna Jameson. Not that Sasha Grey isn't also making an earning but I never particularly warmed to Jameson much, I don't hate her nor do I hate Pamela Anderson, she seems to have a good sense of humour and I dunno, I like seeing pics of her with her children.

I'll look forward to watching Sasha's movie and porn performances and getting to know that side of her and see all these different things as I read in the interview and article. The article is brilliant, for me it was such a refreshing change to read something like that and to know more about the largely big in America and not so much England, East of Eden, and I'm removed from the mystical and romantic decidely so sometimes. I'm a big fan of the movie Dead Poets Society so I will always comeback to the romantic, the truly romantic, the side of life poets with hearts and balls, no not just that kind, write about. I truly recommend reading this article, you don't have to be into porn, you can hate it, just read the article it's not a preach, it's just a beautifully written piece of art.

Last week I read The Vampire's Bride by one of my favourite authors in this world, Amarinda Jones. Its available from Siren Publishing and you know it's a book that excites me a lot. I've talked about political correctness and the rules in sex before. My opinion is that when a heroine trusts a hero, we have to as well and the way the book is written, it's not forced and I'm not a big fan of preachy older brother attitude's from the hero to heroine, I like actions more than words. I will leave you with the blurb and excerpt from this book. This ain't Twilight.

“You are so wrong for me.”

“So you keep telling me.”

“And bad.” So bad but in the most lovely and delicious way.

“Why aren’t you moving?” She had the fullness. She wanted the

Alaric chuckled and began his thrusts into her once more. “You
like it when I’m bad. You like it when I’m inside you—fucking you.”

Oh, fuck yes. “Harder.” Josephine wanted to walk away from
Alaric feeling like she had been shagged within an inch of her life.“I don’t want to hurt you.”

That was sweet. But she needed more. “I want an orgasm.”

Playing with her own clit did not compete with what a man could do.

“Oh, you’ll get that, baby.” Alaric pulled his cock out.

“No…” Josephine whimpered. Alaric responded by backing away
and then dropping his head and fastening his mouth onto her clit. “Oh
my G-G-God.” She clawed at the bedding beneath as Alaric licked
and sucked at the soft pink folds of her pussy. Josephine no longer
cared about her wedding dress or the muted sound of voices outside
the bride’s room. All she wanted was to come with Alaric’s mouth on
her cunt. His fangs were no impediment to her enjoyment. Alaric was
too practiced a lover to let them scratch the delicate skin. Josephine’s
hands caressed his head as he lapped at her flesh. He was devouring
her, and Josephine was more than happy to be on his menu. She
spread her legs wider, needing everything he had. Her body twisted
on the bed, her pelvis pushing up into his face as the beginnings of an
orgasm hit her. She panted and moaned, vaguely aware she called out
something to do with Alaric and love, but in the heat of the moment,
she was not conscious as to what that was.

Alaric lifted his head momentarily, his eyes meeting hers. “I
know, baby. I know.”

Josephine pushed his head back down, aware of the chuckle of
satisfaction from her lover. She was coming, and she wanted Alaric’s
mouth on her clit as she did.

[Siren Allure: Erotic Paranormal Romance, Multiple Partners, Vampires]

"Josephine McDonough loved a vampire once. But he left her. Now she’s set to marry someone else. Someone who will remain true to her. Alaric, her vampire ex-lover, is not about to allow that to happen. He needs her. He loves her. She is also the key to him getting something he dearly wants - Maverick House – it is his birthright.

Alaric crashes her wedding and takes Josephine back to Maverick House. While she loves Alaric, how does she know he will be faithful and not leave her again? When she finds out that he needs her to obtain the house, she is furious. Does Alaric love her at all? And then there’s his cousin Richard. Josephine doesn’t love him, but she lusts after him. He answers the dark, sexual cravings of her soul.

Does Josephine stay or go? And does she have any say it in at all? Maverick House rules their destiny."

I do this backwards sometimes and I also just wanted you all to see how my hero writes. It's so raw and sexy!

Tuesday, 6 July 2010

Sex, how to do everything.

So I'm watching this programme. I like it. I prefer it to the mad cap sex shows, this one is just as erotic and relaxes me too.

In the first ep, there was a man giving himself a blowjob, how to give a man a good blow job and knowing your vagina. I'll start off with the last one. So, this woman walks into a parlour and the guy makes her a clay imitation of her vagina, and yeah we see her crotch and we see the imitation. She's never seen her vagina before. I'll be frank, I know what mine looks like, my lips protrude more than hers. I did say I'll be frank. I don't know if that's a good or bad thing and I don't know how symmetrical I am. NO way in hell would I get my lips done or get one of those designer vaginas. I can come just fine and if no one likes what's down there, they can give themselves a blow job. I'd like to know what the woman thought of herself, did she think she was ugly etc etc.. I do understand if a woman is unhappy with her vagina but I think we're taking perfection too seriously in this world as it is.

So, I found the part where a woman gives her partner a blowjob erotic. And I also found the tattoo I've been wanting to have for some time. (A beautifully done blue butterfly on her shoulder, or was it her upper arm..). She visits a professional, an expert or therapist in sex, and she demonstrates with a dildo how to give a blow job. The start up, the crawl to him making eye contact the entire time, using your legs, your bottom, rubbing your body across him, up and down his whole body, putting a condom on his cock with your mouth, lick up and down his cock, sucking his cock, gag reflex, opening your mouth as though you're doing a closed yawn, small licks like a pussy lickng milk ( yawn and puss licks demonstrated with a lollipop) and then sucking him how you want, licking him, getting to know his cock, what he's liking. The end; come all over you or swallowing. The woman who gave her boyfriend the blowjob referred to it as a gift and she was talking about wanting to do it and not being forced. I have to admit spanking is sexy to me but a guy saying suck my dick babe is only sexy when I'm feeling kinky, it wouldn't be a gift like giving a loving blow job would be. And she said she never spits because it would be like you're repulsed by the man's cum. I agree unless I'm doing the kinky blow job option. Her boyfriend was also on the show with her and said it was difficult to maintain eye contact with his woman when she was moving her body so sexily by crawling to him on the floor. It looked and felt to me like SHE was in charge. She had him and she moved to him like he was the prey.

Alright, so ooh also there were a few men talking about licking a woman's pussy. Do you like that term? I couldn't care less, if I'm aroused, I'm aroused. And I'm aroused. There was talk of making alphabet letters..hmm spelling out my name on my pussy but I'd rather just be licked and eaten. Up and down is good too, but betwen my thighs, licking, sucking and loving me, so, so hot. You'll know when you're giving me something I like technique wise.

Lastly, this other guys gives himself a blow job. So he says he's very flexible and has his legs reaching his head whilst lying down, he's done yoga and he says he has a big penis so that helps him. The presenters said they thought solo sucking was an urban myth. I don't find it erotic but I would like to know if men do. I mean licking my own pussy? Hmmm, I'd have to think about that..

Monday, 5 July 2010

Slowburn, so this and the last posting carry the story on from earlier.

As a recap, Melanie's relationship with Michael is going very well and after some time in their relationship and then in the middle of one of their numerous, lose control, hot, sweaty sex moments, he proposed to her and she accepted. She has to come to terms with the differences between being with the man who thinks she's amazing the reality of everyday life where she's considered the opposite. The last post was her diary entry, a new thing she has started. Now, we go back to the morning after,

"Pity you're dressed," Mel wrapped her arms around Mike, him ready for work, her naked in their bed, "I'd have given you a blow job." She kissed his shirted chest.

"You can still give me one." She noticed he pulled on her hair a little, just a tad when he slid his fingers through it.

"With all that cum you give me, it'd take time to clean up." She smiled up at him.

He wrapped his arms around her, "I mean, later on. I have to run now." He kissed her possessively.

"I'm so horny" She moaned after their kiss.

"So am I."

She rubbed her body against his. Her tits rubbed on his stomach, would his cock feel them?

"" She heard him swear. Her nipples were hard and her pussy wet. She's love to touch his cock, just a quick feel before he went off.

She broke away and he made a sad face at her. "Tie me up."

"I know how much you love me restraining you." He said voice deeper, darker.

"I'd be naked tied to the bed and you'd come home and fuck me."

"As tempting as that does sound, I can't leave you like that for the whole day. It's not practical."

"I know, you're real practical aren't you Detective." She sassed.

He leaned in and kissed her cheek.

"Do you like uniforms?" God, his body was burning, she could feel his heat, his cock would be incredibly swollen with arousal right now.

"Oh fuck."

"School girl?"


"Anything on you is good. School girl is good. Nurse is good too."

"Mm School girl. I'd come dressed as that when I come and see you at work."

"You're coming today?"

"What do you think?"

She had no inhibition around him. She started fingering her pussy.

"Don't..make yourself come."

"Mm...I'd still be hot for you."

"No I want you to wait." He didn't sound so firm, he sounded like he was swallowing.

It was very very hard to stop fingering her pussy but yeah she'd come in front of him now if she kept on anymore.

"So, I'll see you later."

"Yeah." He smiled, and his whole face lit up.

Mel put on some shorts and a tank top, in search for a school girl uniform at such short notice. She hadn't been to a kinky shop before, mostly because Michael always had her naked at his place or hers. It didn't surprise her to know that school girl uniforms were in short supply, she just hoped it was women buying them and they were being fucked as themselves and not 12 year old Tiffany or whatever. She liked the "Daddy" reference as much as the next wet, horny woman though.

Instead of a school girl uniform, she decided to take it one step even sluttier.

Looking in the mirror, she saw her boobs stick out of the contraption. It made them stick right out, so, so, out. It was so sexy for her to know she'd be walking around with her breasts naked in this leather thong type thing up there and her pussy wasn't covered either. What was happening here, was a case of highlighting, and pointing out, pouty tits and pussy, absolutely no covering up.

Kinky really needs to masturbate right about now xx

Sunday, 4 July 2010


I thought about keeping a diary of my emotions. I thought it would help me differentiate between the noise, the memories that were no good to remember combined with bad thoughts and feelings, and the positive inside of me and outside in the world. I think writing this is clearing my head already. The thing is there is a rush of feeling, like I want to let out all this emotion but I just don't want to cry. Again.

Something changed tonight, something really big happened in my life.

I'm writing this early hours of the morning. I couldn't sleep but I remember before going to sleep, I felt so happy and loved. I woke with a jolt from that. It's not that I don't deserve to be happy and I will keep fighting for that, to know there's a part of me that does believe I'm worth it, that I was worth what happened tonight, I still can't believe it, even if the rest of me says well look around, who in their right mind would choose you as their loved on, mother, daughter, relationships, siblings, who would CHOOSE YOU.

The fact is, I'm not able to trust yet. But all the put downs, the bullying and the rubbish, every bit of the negative is making me fight to give as much as I can. Give what? Love.

Mel's diary entry, Slowburn.

Friday, 2 July 2010

I had been looking forward to Carnal Ecstasy for a while.

Since the author Lissa Matthews writes books which I find incredibly erotic, I knew by the blurb and excerpt this one would be anther stunning addition to my bookshelf. I remember a month ago reading one of her books and.. how this month.. how this month is what it is.. I was happy that her book came out don't get me wrong. And when an author can speak to your soul when it doesn't want to be spoken to then it's quite something. It's a Lissa Matthews book so I expected nothing less and inspiring is an understatement for her work.

I'm cynical and I don't believe in love and I don't believe in people saying anything anymore but I LOVE this book. The reason I love Lissa's books so much; the heroes and heroines, they're such a big part of me. Somehow, they just are, like I am them in some way. Books like this speak more to me than fairytales with traditional looks and acts and gestures, when things fuck with you then you don't go after tradition even more so, you go after honesty and no bullshit and Lissa's books are all about that as well as the raw erotic words and need as well as gorgeous humanity and tenderness and a brilliant story..such s simple storyline, a character evolving, it speaks just as loudly as a book with about a women and her cop. (God, cops...fuck).

This isn't a review, this post is too self involved but when inside you're sad and you read something, keep it on your bookshelf, look back on it when you start smiling again, it's not not a funny joke or a momentary noise, when you read this you will smile because you're really smiling. Carnal Ecstasy is a treasure.

Next time readers because, I wanted to devote one post to this book that I LOVE, I will blog about The Vampire's Bride by Amarinda Jones..gosh that made my evening so damned erotic yesterday. And I will keep you updated about a video I intend to make.

Have a good weekend honeys and I will leave you with sparks, an excerpt followed by the blurb followed by another excerpt from Carnal Ecstasy,

"He realized then it was a good thing he wasn’t drinking anything right at that moment because he’d have spewed it everywhere. She’d said some very serious stuff he wanted to touch on, tell her it was okay to want her own life, that he’d been there in the exact position she found herself in. He wanted to touch on all that, but his male brain only settled on two things. Porn and women. “Porn? You look at porn?”

“Yes. I love it. The women are so beautiful and the men are… Should I not like it? I mean, I know what I was told growing up, but honestly, I can’t seem to help it.”

“Sure you should like it. There’s nothing wrong with it. I was just surprised is all. We’ll talk about the girl kissing later.” Porn. His downy innocent liked porn. Maybe he should pull out some of his vintage skin mags. “What are you going to do now?”

“I don’t know. I have a specialty in event planning. Maybe I can find a job at a hotel or in a restaurant. I haven’t thought that far ahead. Guess that seems irresponsible.”

“I understand. I was only curious.”

She took another sip of her coffee then another. Whipped cream collected on her upper lip and it took every ounce of his self-control not to lean forward and lick it off.

“You didn’t have sex with me.”

He grinned at the way she just threw the statement out there. “Not in the traditional way, no.”

“Do you not want to?”

Oh yeah, he wanted to. Needed to. And would. Soon. After breakfast. She’d be lucky if they made it back upstairs to his bed. Hell, he wasn’t sure he’d survive coffee before laying her out on the bar and climbing on top of her. “Yes, I do. I just wanted to play with you some first. You have a body made for sex, for lust, for a little kinkiness.”

“Why did you use the bottle?”

“Why did you like it so much?”

Excerpt "The minute Carrie meets tattooed, bad-boy bartender Dallon, her decision is made. He’s the one, her ticket to freedom and a new, independent life. She’s tired of dictates and zero dates and following the path laid out before her by her well-meaning-but-completely-out-of touch-with-her-reality religious parents.

Dallon sees the buttoned-up, full-of-curves woman outside the grocery store and feels the flames of hell licking at his heels. When she asks him for directions to the large, nearby university where she’s starting work, his gut-twisting lust for her doesn’t diminish, but those flames start to singe his tough-as-nails hide.

With Dallon’s promise of not sleeping with anyone associated with the university his father is the dean of about to go up in smoke, Carrie takes the first exit off the Heavenly Highway straight onto Sin Street. She wants Dallon to teach her all the things a good girl should never know, and she won’t take Hell no for an answer.

Reader Advisory: What Dallon does with a beer bottle may be illegal in forty-eight out of fifty states…and at least two territories."

Available from Ellora's Cave.

"Dallon wiped down the bar for what seemed the hundredth time. Damn. Was the night ever going to end? He didn’t want to be there. It was that simple, but what he couldn’t figure out was why. He loved the bar, loved being in the bar, loved owning his third of the bar. It was his home, his safe haven, but tonight he just couldn’t muster up the love for it.

Tossing the rag in the sink, he knew exactly why he was so restless. Carrie. The woman he’d met at the grocery store earlier in the day. He’d walked out, carrying his purchases, and stopped dead when he heard her voice as she talked on the phone and just stared at her. Dressed conservatively in a knee-length skirt that hugged her hips and a blindingly white, stiffly starched button-down shirt, he couldn’t take his eyes off her. Her dark brown hair was pulled back in a tight ponytail and all he wanted to do was pull it. He’d wanted her on her knees right then and there, sucking the hell out of his dick while he held his bags of pretzels and cans of peanuts in one hand and pulled on that ponytail with the other. And here hours later, he wanted her still, naked on the bar, with her legs over his shoulders while he ate at her pussy. He wanted her and the innocence in her eyes so much he hurt.

They spoke briefly when she’d approached him and asked for directions to her new job. She’d explained that she was new in town, knew how to find her way from her apartment to where she would be working, but that she’d gotten all turned around while running errands and was lost. As she talked, all he could see in his mind was his ass burning in hell for the outrageously impure thoughts he was having about her mouth, her tits inside a bra he figured was serviceable and not at all sexy, and the holy land between her thighs. He’d had virgins and innocents before, and at times loved being the one to pop cherries. But this particular cherry was not going to be picked by him because she worked at the one place in town he swore never to associate with again, and that included the people there. She was off limits.

What a goddamn fucking shame too.

She’d asked his name and had willingly given hers, something he could have gone without knowing because now he knew what to call out when he came later. And that was just going to make it worse. Her name on his lips, in his mind.

Dallon looked up at the clock. Thirty minutes and he could close everything down for the night. He could lock up and head upstairs, jack off to the memory of her sweet, soft self. It was probably a good thing he didn’t know where she lived or that’s where he’d be going. He didn’t think someone like her would venture into a bar, so he was safe there too, even though she’d asked where he worked and if it was likely she’d be seeing him again, how it would be nice to have at least one friend.

He’d cursed himself for telling her where the bar was at the same moment he was giving her those directions too. Resisting temptation had never been his strong suit and damned if he wasn’t tempted from head to toe by her lush body and sweet voice and dark, melted chocolate eyes.

“Hello, Dallon.”

His head shot up and his gaze landed on her. “What the hell are you doing here?” he barked.

Her eyes widened at his harsh tone and the question he’d carelessly thrown out at her. He hadn’t meant to, but he was too close to the edge. He couldn’t remember the last time he wanted someone so much. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it that way, I just…”

She smiled and walked closer to the bar and to him, undeterred. God help him. He flinched inwardly at his choice of word. “It’s okay. I’m sure we’re both equally surprised.”

She was so pretty, so downy and pure. He wanted to defile every inch of her flesh until nothing could ever erase the memory of him from her skin. He wanted so much but he fucking needed her to leave. “You shouldn’t be here, Carrie.” Literally, the man or woman upstairs needed to send a bolt of lightning south and strike him dead for the thoughts he was having about this woman.

“Why not? This is a bar and I want a drink.” She sat down on a barstool directly across from him and linked her fingers on top of the dark, scarred wood.

He sighed. Why not? Oh, because the kind of things he wanted to do to her would ruin him for any other woman. And he’d bet she’d never had a drop of alcohol before. “You do, huh? Anything in particular?” There’s no way he’d give her just anything. He didn’t want her throwing up.

“Maybe a beer? One of those kinds with lime. You know, from the commercials of the couple on the beach. I like lime.”

Right. Beer wasn’t a bad choice. He personally couldn’t stand the stuff, but it was milder than a whiskey or tequila or rum. He dug around in the ice chest to his right for a Corona, popped the top off with the bottle opener and placed it on a cardboard coaster in front of her. “Take it slow. Don’t take a big swallow at first.”

She nodded and picked up the bottle and inhaled. It was the cutest thing how her nose wrinkled. She tentatively put the beer to her mouth, and just before she wrapped her lips around the opening, she looked up at him and lowered it slightly. “Do you like beer?”

Should he be honest or should he tell a little white lie? “Yes, every now and then.” What could the fib hurt? Whether he drank beer or not didn’t matter. What did matter was her feeling as if she weren’t completely alone in this.


When she wrapped her mouth around the lip of the bottle and tilted it up, letting some of the smooth, golden liquid flow across her tongue, Dallon fought back a groan. She swallowed, and as he watched her throat working, all he could think of was her mouth wrapped around his dick and her swallowing his come. “What do you think?”

She took another small sip then a bigger sip, and then set the bottle back down on the coaster. “It’s hard to describe. It’s not really a pleasant taste but it’s not a bad one either.” She smiled. “I think I like it. How much do I owe you?”

“You don’t. It’s on the house.”

“Oh no, I couldn’t accept that,” she said, and reached into her purse.

Dallon reached across the bar and stayed her hand. The contact was sizzling hot. “Yes, you can accept it. It’s on the house,” he said again. He didn’t want to let go of her wrist, but he did. It was time for her to go, time for him to lock up and forget he’d ever met her. He liked being single, unencumbered. He liked one-night stands and no morning-after awkwardness. If he had her once, he’d have her again and again. Not good for his peace of mind and his carefree existence. “I need to close up.”

He didn’t know what else he should say, but she didn’t respond. She was looking around the bar, turning full circle on the stool. When she faced him again, she picked up the bottle and took another swallow. Damn, but she had a pretty mouth.

“I don’t want to leave.”

Shit. Don’t say anything. Not a word. Not a single solitary word. “You should.”

She raised her eyes to look him square in his, a silent challenge reflected there. “Why?”

Dammit. He planted his hands on the edge of the bar and leaned toward her until he could smell the beer on her breath. “Because you don’t know who I am and you don’t know what fire you’re playing with.”

She licked at her lips. He wasn’t even sure she knew she did it. “W-who are you?”

No sense lying about it or anything else now. “The devil himself.”