Thursday, 28 January 2010

Valentines Day.

Warning; this is the most full of random bits that have no point post I have written so far. I gave it a title, in truth I just want to blabber on about Training Day. Again. & boys. And sex. The thing is, it's random but I mean it all and am going to do it all. Oo-er.

Today was one of those days when I wanted to be surprised. I don't go looking for suprises, whilst I give my opinions readily, I don't give a lot of other things away. When I say I want to be surprised, I also mean it in a romantic way. And in a sexual way.

Sometimes I want Michael Stevens in my story to surprise me. Truth is, I'm working on that. I don't want to create a cliche and it's really a case of me investing more time in that story to unravel him more. I've certainly unraveled his body. And I've got aspects of his character according to Mel and his feelings towards her in the piece which was from his pov but I look to Slowburn as a comfort and it's just too familiar at the moment. So maybe I need to distance myself from it like I did one story..Those Two..I was quite creative with that. I don't know but I'm not going to unravel his character just for the sake of it, it's just this is the story that won't quit. For me. It's going to continue in ten years, I'll be adding more to it. And the sex..I mean you know I need to surprised in reality about that too for me to write more about it. I can't just rely on me when I'm incredibly horny, you know.

I see so many bitchy men, I mean just today this man and woman went past and he was talking loudly about this woman whom he referred to as the lesbian and said something about how she would look good in a skirt and the woman he was walking with tittered with they do..and then he was all "fucking" this and "fucking" that and I felt nauseous. Guys like that make me puke. Ugh. I know when I was at school I had this crush on a guy - he was SO clever and good at everything- but he was the biggest sad person ever. He would whine so much. He enjoyed the company of women more than men. He was just a bitchy girl! So Michael Stevens is my antidote. I initially and still find Training Day incredibly erotic. Laugh out loud. But, Ethan Hawke- just perfect. His character, his personality is okay and I get the drama, his opposite side of the coin, the stand up to Denzel's not just bad ass but in my opinion psychopath, I get it but his uniform, his mannerisms, his arms, his hair, his eyes, his lips. F.U.C.K. Mike Stevens was born out of my lust for Hawke's Jake Hoyt.

I like boys and men who are creative. Who may not be the smartest or the most noble or the most I don't know ..there..type person. I've often found myself falling for the funny boy in the class. Or the ones seen as losers. The bad ones- because they always said the funniest things to me. I think I like it because I'm weird and a little funny too and I still hang onto my naive hope and I do hope this..that men and women aren't that different. I just don't buy the whole male nature thing. I mean what about evolving as a human?

And when they say men like to protect and find women's vulnerability sexy, that makes me gag too.

I've decided to send myself little surprises. You know that quote from Clueless about any normal girl sending herself flowers? Yeah. I'm doing that. But not for a guy. For me. Happy Valentines Day. I like Valentines Days. I don't like it when a couple snogs in front of me but Valentines Day and the whole commerical thing? Man, shut up! I love the creativity.

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