If it seemed like she was intensely into it and that she got that way often, it was to completely lose herself. She had not slept for a few nights and every emotion she felt, felt heightened. She could lose herself in one hysterical sob but tears made her feel worse. Sex wasn't a cure but actually Michael cured her in some way. And in some ways he was dangerous too. There was not a thing she wouldn't do sexually for him..even if it didn't please her. He must know that. He must have been able to sense it but not once did he take advantage. No, instead he controlled himself so much.
To know you are being protected is possibly the greatest feeling you could have in your life.
"Are you okay?"
She nodded not turning to look at him. She was topless and a hot sticky mess. And horny.
"What made you stop?"
"Me." She closed her eyes.
If only the bad memories that were recycled into existing parts of the day would disappear entirely, she would give him her whole heart, body and soul.
With a gasp she opened her eyes. She hadn't feel him touch her. But he was. And the car had stopped. And they were no longer on the road. He had pulled over. She looked back at him.
"Did you know I felt numb?"
"You were somewhere else." He said.
"I'm just not sure how to deal with pain. I just don't know how to stop it. And it hurts, but maybe I'll become numb. Hey, what happens if I become one of those numb women who don't feel a thing when their hus..boyfriends..screw them?"
"You're not a numb person."
"So why are you crying?" She whispered tremelously.
She heard him swallow.
"I'm going to make love to you and then we'll talk."
They both nodded sadly at each other. Yes he was going to make love to her and yes she felt her heart BEAT. Yet there was something that was going to die today.
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