Sunday, 24 October 2010

BAD!


I would love to keep this blog a hot bed of sexual excitement, however look at this http://www.amazon.co.uk/Secretary-Various/dp/B00006L3OV/ref=sr_1_3?s=music&ie=UTF8&qid=1287958218&sr=1-3

FORTY NINE POUNDS FOR A NEW CD?!

I know this is a cult movie...

And I'd pay for a used cd but I wouldn't pay 18 pounds for it. You can get two hardcover books for that price.

Let's just say I'm currently writing this listening to the "Main Title" in its entireity and it's not from the cd nor amazon sample. I think the pricing is absolutely ridiculous and nauseating. These people are dicks.

I have, however, the comfort of this to get me through; http://search.barnesandnoble.com/Return-to-the-Chateau/Pauline-Reage/e/9780345394651/?itm=3&USRI=return+to+the+chateu

Well, for Christmas (at three quarters the price listed on BN I may add!) along with my beloved Comfort Food hardcover.

(& did you notice the "Yes, Sir" book?)

Saturday, 23 October 2010

Hogtied and helpless. A story I am writing, more added.

I thought it best to post the story from the start each time I add more to it. Rather than having a link to the previous part of the story. That way, we may just have wandered into some sort of organised system here. Oh look bang on midnight.


This story is dedicated to Sir.

I woke up suspended 6ft in air. I couldn’t move. When I looked up, I saw the sky swirling around me. I had a sudden chest pain, I was petrified, but I couldn’t speak. I was in a strange place. I had been kidnapped, my hands and feet were tied up, my mouth was gagged. As of this moment, I was being carried over a stranger’s shoulder.

I smelled something unfamiliar which made me feel sick though the cloth in my mouth. I puked up all over the stranger’s shoulder. I felt something big manhandle my weak, queasy body, and I was now like a jelly in someone’s arms, someone who was strange, being held over a sink. My head was shoved towards water. It was running and it was cold. It was relief.

I felt my face being touched, underneath my mouth, I could now make out that male fingers were wiping me. I breathed in and in that moment felt a jolt. Still tied, I was plonked onto a kitchen chair. How I didn’t fall, I don’t know. Something harsh gripped my hair. My head was being pulled up by my hair. I heard a scraping sound. My eyes were forced to make contact with a strange man sitting opposite me.


I was..angry? Angry should have been the correct feeling. I ANGRILY studied his face. The stupidity of it was that I hoped to get an answer. Why are you doing this to me? How much at your mercy am I?

The gag around my mouth was loosened. I kept looking at the stranger. My lips felt swollen. I swallowed. If I could move, I would have fetched myself a drink of water. Ice cold water is what I needed. Craved. But I was tied up everywhere but my mouth. When I looked down, my legs were tied to my knees, to my cunt, to my breasts, to my neck and to my fists. I could shake my head so the cloth gag was loose.

“Get it over with” was on my lips as my body was shoved on the table. Instead I could only yelp with pain. I felt a sharp smack on my bottom. ANGRILY, I knew that I was COMPLETELY at his mercy.

I thought there was going to be a knife. Either death or freedom from my binds. Instead, I felt tighter. I started hyperventilating. I felt a hand on my face. I pressed into it. Mercy. NO. He slapped my cheek. My head turned to one side out of surprise and pain. I started to cry and my breath came out thick and fast. My head was pulled upward again. Lips touched mine. He was going to kiss me. Please. NO. I got spit in my mouth. I lifted my eyes towards him. I felt like a whore.


It dawned on me that I was going to be treated like a whore. I was going to get raped. I was going to have his cock fucking the consent away, my cunt to be a whore for his cock. I listened out to any small sound, grasping at it, it was a clue as to what was going to happen to me next. I had almost lost my life once, drowning but I never became afraid of water. But I was afraid of being unsupported and balancing at a height and I know that that contributed to only a few meagre attempts that I made to struggle in my binds and attempt to throw my body off the table. I wasn‘t so afraid that I would rather get raped than throw my helpless, tied body off and feel that short fall to the ground. Whatever was going on in my head I couldn’t explain, instead I just listened.

The anticipation chilled me. I had forgotten about my heat beating violently. There was nothing at this moment I could control.

“Smell.” I lifted my eyes up to my a finger. I smelled it. I had no choice. “This is what I smell like.” He leaned down so I could see his lips.

I could cry. I could fake cry. Surely I could fake cry when my life was in danger. He was turning this into some delicious sex fantasy to him and I felt that he was going to take his time to enjoy it, that there was some sensuality in this for him. I wanted to know what was to happen. I wanted to say, just tell me what is going to happen next. So that I could know and be prepared. I’d take the smack, the sudden hit to my face. But my mind was also wanting to block some of this out by distancing myself as an observer. It’s stupid but I looked at the ceiling lights above me, I knew that I liked the room, humour linked to danger.

This Christmas, Comfort Food.


I'm very happy that Kitty Thomas' Comfort Food is now available to buy in hardcover. It will be the ONLY kinky book I own in hard cover. It's available from Amazon and Barnes and Noble (BN are doing it cheaper). As I'm not in America and have to wait about a fortnight before I get it, as something that would make me happy as a sort of conquest is that I will ask this person who says they are not getting me anything to do with sex at all ever (!) as a present, to buy the book that changed my life for Christmas. And when I get it, I can just imagine being a little fetishy over the cover, you know trying to bend it a little, smell it..

I've signed up to Kitty Thomas' newsletters and she says that her next book Guilty Pleasures is going to be available in December. Comfort Food created a bit of a storm, it got people talking, it provoked and it also in its non conventional extremely intense way woo-ed people. So I am looking forward to Guilty Pleasures in December!

Teaser book descrip of Comfort Food

BOOK DESCRIPTION: Emily Vargas has been taken captive. As part of his conditioning methods, her captor refuses to speak to her, knowing how much she craves human contact. He's far too beautiful to be a monster. Combined with his lack of violence toward her, this has her walking a fine line at the edge of sanity. Told in the first person from Emily's perspective, Comfort Food explores what happens when all expectations of pleasure and pain are turned upside down, as whips become comfort and chicken soup becomes punishment. DISCLAIMER: This is not a story about consensual BDSM. This is a story about "actual" slavery. If reading an erotic story without safewords makes you uncomfortable, this is not the book for you. This is a work of fiction, and the author does not endorse or condone any behavior done to another human being without their consent. REVIEWS: " . . . dark, provocative, and glaringly honest . . ." H. Turley, Reader "Disturbing, twisted, and just plain weird . . . " Amy, GoodReads Reviewer " . . . an intelligently written, well-researched and very erotic exploration of the extremity of power dynamics . . . It's refreshing to read someone brave enough to tackle erotic themes that are truly taboo and seldom published." - Remittance Girl, Reader and author of "Gaijin" and other erotic novellas "They are a match made in a twisted sort of hell. I don't, as a rule, like erotica, but I'm likely to check out Ms. Thomas' future work just to see how far she can push the envelope." - A Taste For Ebooks, Review Blog

Amazon.

It's a mad world this internet. I love it but..

Don't say in comments what you wouldn't to someone's face.

It's very simple. Being very aware of internet bullying campaigns, youtube, facebook, there are people who are absolutely viscious. Fair enough you don't like something or someone but to use language like I would run her over and kick her (actually where they said they would kick her- I'm not going to print, it's too degrading but you can guess), I don't care how annoying their appearance or persona is, how are YOU even human? Having a blog, you can take things further, you can write paragraphs and talk about things on YOUR space but the internet also acts a great shield, the abuser suffers no real remorse for their actions.

Thursday, 21 October 2010

Do you think sisterhood exists? Is it exclusive to some?


I'm thinking just leave the question as it is. My own opinion is that whilst I'm obviously human, I care about things that other people care about, I find it's really about how you take any treatment given to you and I find rising above it, NOT ignoring helps. If I write I have felt excluded it will come across as nothing but a VICTIM stamp and a plea for attention. So I won't go there. The reason I ask the question is just I feel and I see around me, hypocrisy, judgement and basically non sisterhood between women. I've always despised the bitchy nature that seems to be associated with women, fact is I think men are equally as guilty. I don't hate other women, I don't hate men, I don't feel it necessary to even place my trust in them as a whole, in general, I'm not cynical about them, I think people generalise and underestimate too much- but that's just it I think women underestimate others. Not just me. I mean in general. There's too much judgement I feel. I wish it was like childhood in a way, you know when you were 3 and you sat and played with anyone, I wish that innocence wasn't replaced by cynicism because I really don't think it's been replaced by knowledge.

There's an exclusion which is more so in some races and so called cultures, there's a lot of stupidity too, like skin colours in your own race. How light you are or how dark.

The jealousy argument is void as I don't think that it's a reason for being a fuck to someone. Like I say I mean this in general. I am cryptic when I need to be but if I have to say something, I will go ahead and say it, I'm not afraid of dropping names because I'd say the same thing to their face. Sad thing is the cliche of looking your "enemy" in the eyes isn't true..you only get more animosity. But that's a whole other post, probably entitled "Is respect completely dead?"

And I wonder just how much judgement comes with support? Can support between women be unconditional?

Wednesday, 20 October 2010

"Today I found something beautiful and decided to break it."

"I wanted to see it shatter in my hand and crumble at my feet. Her name is Emily Vargas. She's bright and educated and stunning. Articulate. She'll want someone to talk to her."

Comfort Food by Kitty Thomas.


I like that but not this


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ey09JR0cRh0


I'd like to add a few more words to this post, an explanation maybe if I feel I need to, in the future.

Worth a read.

The first link is for something I read about bullying. I found it to be relatively non apologetic, as opposed to some accounts which quite frankly anger me. Why are YOU calling yourself a "weird kid" when the bully is the weird kid and they're a sociopath, I don't care what age they. Bullying is not acceptable and the bullshit continues about it being tough love, the norm and a way of working out your social status. Stop already. It's WEIRD, STRANGE, MAD to pick on someone.

http://wickedwitchofwest.blogspot.com/2010/10/heres-what-i-read-about-bullying.html


The second link has my own thoughts. http://wickedwitchofwest.blogspot.com/2010/10/i-read-something-today-about-bullying.html